We’ve all done it and after a couple of cocktails, alas, we’ll do it again. The universally stupid mistake that will leave us hanging our heads the next morning. You know what I’m referring to, you got it: Drunk dialling.
Let’s paint a picture shall we. Your latest guy has neglected to treat you in the manner you deserve. So what; you don’t need him, you’re going to organize a girl’s night out on the town. You are going to celebrate your independence and general fabulosity
Aa well as enjoying a few drinks and some sisterly bonding. You book a table at a chic new nightspot and even get your hair and nails done. You all arrive looking svelte and gorgeous and your confidence is soaring. This is going to be fun. After the first cocktail, you idly check your phone, more out of habit than anything, but you notice that you don’t have any missed calls or texts. Not to worry, those really cute guys at the bar have been giving you the eye. After cocktail number two you reach into your bag for gloss and notice your phone. Nothing. Whatever, who cares right?
Now with the passage of time and tequila this scene turns from one of ‘independent womanhood’ to ‘single white female.’ You check your phone again, this time on purpose. Still no call, not even a text. ‘I wonder what he’s up to tonight?’
‘I should call him.’ Four tiny little words, one colossally bad idea.
And so in a fit of cocktail fuelled stupidity you sneak off to the bathroom out of earshot of your well meaning, disapproving friends to hit that little green button in the hopes of a fabulously flirtatious conversation and a passionate late night tryst with Mr So Not A Good Idea. And lets face it, you know it’s not a good idea – it’s why you snuck off to the bathroom in the first place. No answer. Naturally, you leave a message. Even worse idea.
So why do you do it? Are you just horny or are you hoping in your alcohol induced fuzz that this call will lead him to realize you are in fact the woman of his dreams and you’ll live happily ever after all because you were brave enough to pick up the phone on this fateful night. Lay off the vodka lady! This will not have the fairytale ending that you are hoping for… how many fairytales do u know of that start with ‘I got drunk and called him at 2am…’
In the morning you will now have to deal with a massive hangover and the humiliating knowledge that he is sharing a beer with friends whilst playing your drunken diatribe on speakerphone. Repeatedly. My advice is simple; Put two aspirin and a litre of water next to your bed and delete his number before leaving the house to meet the girls. You’ll thank me in the morning.
